Biography

A daughter to hardworking Ukranian immigrant parents, Sputak was a loud, annoying child. Growing up, she was often bullied by her fellow classmates, forcing her to gradually become more reserved as the years passed by. Eager to prove the world wrong, she delved into the rabbit hole of conspiracy theories, and grew particularly fond of mermaids. Many days, she would sit by the small lake near her house, dreaming of the day where she would finally become a mermaid, the day where she would finally be able to mock those that had once put her down. Joselyn had the spirit and the passion - that was undeniable - but she sure did not have the skills to be a mermaid as she could hardly doggy-paddle. One day, in a fit of excitement and what can only be described as a frenzy-driven madness, she plunged into the cold water and nearly drowned. She was seconds away from passing out completely, but was somehow fortunate enough to be saved by a passerby.

From that day on, Sputak became almost like a completely different person. She veered away from all things related to mermaids, and became more obssessed with conspiracy theories. But the more she learned about these conspiracy theories, the more she could start seeing their flaws. For instance, the conspiracy theory that global warming was generated by the government to trick civilians seemed outrageously wrong. She was inspired, and began regularly attending climate change protests. During one of these protests, Sputak happened to meet Sammy Urtzal, who chose to hire her because she looked reliable. And also because she knew how to math. But mainly because of her reliable look.

And just like that, Sputak made a complete 180 in life - for good. Surprisingly, she is actually extremely good at her job.